Andazi ukuba ndigqibe njani ukudlala Nceda, amaphepha ngaphandle kokujonga ukufana. Kutheni lo mdlalo, kuyo yonke imidlalo ekusemva kwam? Ngaba yayiyinto engaqondakaliyo? Kuyahlekisa, ngokwenene, ukuba andizange ndicinge ngako. Ingathi ndilibele okunene ukuba ubomi bam buchazwe kangakanani zizitampu kwiipaspoti, zingaphi ubusuku bokungalali endichithe ndixhalabile ngokutsho okufanayo.
Ndibhala oku ndisuka kwikhaya lobuntwana eSouthern California. Ndize apha kukuhlangana kweminyhadala, eyokuqala phakathi kwayo ibiyinkonzo yesikhumbuzo sika makhulu. Wayengumfuduki waseJamani kuqala, ummi wase-US yesibini. Kwisikhumbuzo, umalume wam wathetha ngefoto ebonisa umakhulu nodadewabo njengamantombazana amancinci, edlala eyadini yabo. Wathetha ngendlela ukuba ububajongile ngelo xesha, kunganzima ukucinga ukuba ubomi babo bebuza kwahluka njani.
Wayethetha, ngokuyinxenye, malunga neMpuma neNtshona Jamani.
Ootatomkhulu noomakhulu babengabantwana xa kwaqhambuka iMfazwe yesibini (II) yeHlabathi, bazalelwa endaweni engalunganga ngexesha elingalunganga. Umakhulu wam wakhula engqongwe yile mfazwe, kwaye wayemdala phakathi kweSoviet. Wabaleka eMpuma Jamani ngeminyaka yoo-1950, emva kokuncokola kamnandi kwindlela yakhe yokufumana ulinda lomda. Uye wawela. Uwafumene amaphepha akhe.
Umama wawafumana loo maphepha kwiinyanga ezimbalwa ezidlulileyo, kunye notatomkhulu wam, naye, nangona babengowaseMelika. I-Operation Paperclip, ibhengeza isihloko. Kwakudala ngaphambi kokuba amaphepha ashicilelwe, utatomkhulu waye wabizelwa emkhosini waseJamani, ngasekupheleni kwemfazwe. IJamani yayiphelelwa ngamadoda. Utat'omkhulu wayeneminyaka elishumi elinesihlanu. Yonke iklasi yakhe yamabanga aphakamileyo yaphoswa ngasemva kwemipu yokulwa inqwelo moya. Abantwana nje, balambile kwaye bayoyika. Kodwa emva kwemfazwe, kwicala lasentshona lokwahlula, wabuyela esikolweni. Ufumene i-PhD yakhe kwimathematics, kwaye loo nto yamenza wanomdla kurhulumente waseMelika. Umlo obandayo wawusele ugcwele ishumi leminyaka, kwaye amaMelika ayehlutha yonke italente yobunjineli baseJamani ababenako. I-Operation Paperclip yamkhulula utatomkhulu kwiyunifomu awayeyinxibile, kwaye yamzisa kunye nomakhulu wam kwilizwe abebeliza ekhaya ngenye imini. Wayesebenza kwinkqubo ka-Apollo, kwaye kamva, uShuttle. Konke kungenxa yokuba umntu othile kwi-ofisi yaseburhulumenteni uthathe isigqibo sokubonelela ngamaphepha amatsha.
Bendingazubakho ukuba bekungekho eso sigqibo.
Ukukhawuleza ukuya kwinkulungwane yama-21. Ukuba awulilo ilungu losapho okanye kwicandelo elikhethekileyo (njenge, yithi, isayensi yerokethi), ukungena kweli lizwe lishishini elirhabaxa. Ndiyayazi le nto kuba iqabane lam neIceland lachitha ixesha elingcono kule minyaka ilithoba idlulileyo ndizama ukuba sendaweni enye. Kude kube ziinyanga ezintlanu ezidlulileyo, abantu abathandana besini esinye bengakhange babonwe phantsi komthetho wase-US wokufuduka. Nokuba sitshatile, ngekhe sibe nazo ezinye iindlela. Ibali lethu lide, kodwa lanele ukutsho, libandakanya iphepha elininzi, izikhululo zeenqwelo moya, iminwe, ingcebiso zomthetho, kunye nexesha elahlukileyo. Yahlukene iminyaka. Uninzi lwazo lwacwangciswa yindoda engazange yaneliswe ngamaphepha eqabane lam. Kwakungakhathali ukuba irekhodi lakhe licocekile kangakanani, okanye zilunge kangakanani iinjongo zakhe, okanye ukuba, njengoko ndicetyisiwe, igama lam lishiywe ngokupheleleyo kulo. Ngenxa yezizathu esingakhange sifumane mpendulo icacileyo, wakhawuleza wabamba isitampu esibomvu. Ngenxa yoko, iqabane lam alizange libe li-stateide ukususela ngo-2006.
Kodwa ucango lwavulwa ngoJuni, ngokufa kwe-DOMA. Ndizibonile iindaba, kodwa ayikhange indibethe ngokupheleleyo de ndafumana i-imeyile evuyisayo evela kumhlobo, osebenza kwinkampani yomthetho wokufuduka. Ndiwafundile amazwi akhe kwikhaya lam ngoku eReykjavik, ndaza ndalila. Ndingabuyisa iqabane lam kwicala lam lehlabathi.
Laa mhlobo uyatshata kwiveki ezayo, kwaye mna neqabane lam siyaya. Apha, eCarlifonia. Ndahamba nomlingane wam saya kwiNdlu yoZakuzo yase-US eReykjavik kwinyanga ephelileyo, ndimbambe ngesandla emva kokuba sidlule kumtshini wesinyithi, sijonga kabini ukuba sinamaphepha afanelekileyo. Amaphepha avela kumphathi wakhe, amaphepha avela kumnini-mhlaba, amaphepha avela ebhankini. Iphepha elivela kum, elichaza ukuba iqabane lam liza kudibana nam, licacisa ukuba ndihlala kwaye ndisebenza eIceland, kwaye asinazicwangciso zakufuduka. Kulungile ukuba ndibandakanyeke ngoku. Sivunyelwe ukuba sibekho.
Umfazi osemva kwekhawuntari wayecocekile, kodwa emhle. Ubuze imibuzo emininzi, kwaye waxolisa ukuba ithatha ixesha elingakanani itshekhi yeminwe. Wayonwabile ngamaphepha. Kwakungekho sitampu sibomvu ngeli xesha. Uxelele iqabane lam ukuba angathatha i-visa yakhe yabakhenkethi ngosuku olulandelayo.
Ngaba sikhona isizathu sokundithumela kwakhona? libuze iqabane lam.
Eli bhinqa lalibonakala linovelwano. Ndingakunika zonke izitampu endinokuzenza, utshilo, kodwa baya kwenza nantoni na abayifunayo.
Ngethuba eli phepha lonyuka, inqwelomoya yendiza yam iya kube ingenile. Senze konke okungaphezulu kwebhodi kunye nomthetho. Asikaze saphule nayiphi na imigaqo. Ukanti iiveki, ndiyoyika ukubakho kwearhente yamasiko akwiimeko ezimbi.
Kwaye ndikufungisa, ndididekile njengoko injalo, akukho nanye kwezi eza engqondweni njengoko ndenza isigqibo sokudlala Nceda, amaphepha .
Umdlalo uzichaza njengowonwabisayo we-dystopi. Umdlali, ophethe izitampu ezibomvu neziluhlaza, uthatha isigqibo ngekamva labo banokuba ngabaphambukeli kwilizwe eliyintsomi laseArstotzka. Imigaqo yokungena iya isiba nzima ngakumbi nangakumbi ngosuku ngalunye. Abaphambukeli bafuna iimvume zokungena. Abasebenzi bafuna iimvume zokusebenza. Abemi baseKolechia bafuna ukuskena okupheleleyo lomzimba. Ukuphela kweveki yokuqala, idesika yam ibiyinto engcolileyo- iincwadi zemithetho, ukunyoba, amakhadi eminwe, ukubhalwa kweliso elibukhali. Khange ndikwazi ukuzibamba ndiqaphele ukujikwa kwendawo yokusebenzela exineneyo nendawo eboniswe kwisakhelo esingentla - iliso lentaka elicocekileyo lokujonga indawo yam yokungena, nendawo engenanto ngapha nangapha. Yonke loo mithetho, yenzelwe nje ukuhamba ukusuka kwelinye icala lolwakhiwo ukuya kwelinye. Okukhona usiya umva, kokukhona kuya kuba sengqiqweni ngakumbi. Ndibe nomfanekiso-ngqondweni wokudada ngaphezulu kweplanethi, ndijonge ezantsi kumazwekazi ahlukane kakhulu kuneemephu onokuthi ukholelwe, uthathela ingqalelo imigaqo efunekayo yokuhamba kwindawo endinokuyigubungela ngokulula ngobhontsi wam.
Kwaye ndadlala ngemigaqo. Unyana wam wayebulawa yindlala kwaye unkosikazi wam wayegula, kwaye ukuba ndingajija, ndandizakubekwa emthendelekweni intlawulo endiyifunayo yokutya kunye namayeza. Andikhathalelanga izibongozo zowesifazane onemvume yokungena ephelelwe lixesha, owayengambonanga unyana wakhe kwiminyaka emithandathu. Unyana wakho, nenekazi? Okwam unyana. Ndenza nje umsebenzi wam.
Ndiye ndacinga ukuba eli binzana amaxesha amaninzi, nangona ngokutshintsha izimelabizo. Ndichithe iiyure ezininzi kwizikhululo zeenqwelo moya. Ndiyakwazi ukukuxelela indlela ukhuseleko olwahluke ngayo, kuxhomekeke kwindawo obalekela kuyo okanye osuka kuyo. Iindidi ezahlukeneyo zemibuzo, ubude obuqhelekileyo bemigca, ukucoceka kokukhawulezisa. Ndihlala ndincuma xa ndisiya kwiindawo zokujonga, kwaye ndigcina ilizwi lam lilula. Ndithobela ngokukhawuleza okukhulu. Wenza nje umsebenzi wakhe, ndiyazixelela, njengokuba umntu ongaziwayo ebaleka umva wezandla zakhe phezu kwamabele am. Kwaye emva koko, njengokuba umsindo uqala ukungena, eyona nto ihlala indinyibilikisa: Musa. Awunakho ukuhlawula elinye itikiti. Kufuneka uye ekhaya.
Ndijonge abantu kumdlalo behambelana ngokuthula. Ndiphinde ndazilwela xa ndandijonga iifoto ze ze imizimba yabasemzini. Xa bengakhange benze oko, ndandibavalela. Ndivalele abantu abaninzi ngeziphoso ezincinci emva kokuba omnye woonogada ethembise ngokundinciphisa ibhonasi ayifumeneyo yokubamba. Ndifumene ndiziva ndonwabile ngenxa yeempazamo- hayi, hayi kwiimpazamo ngokwazo, kubantu abazenzileyo. Yintoni iqela lezidenge. Babengayazi njani imithetho? Bacacile! Ndaziva ndiziva ndinamandla angandifanelanga njengoko ndandigibisela isitampu esibomvu phantsi. I-smug, kwaye imbi. Ulenze.
Nceda, amaphepha undibonisile ukuba uluvo lwam lovelwano lunokugcwala ngokufanelekileyo ngocoselelo olufanelekileyo. Yonke into ethathiweyo yayilikhadi lamanqaku kunye nomxholo othile wentelekelelo. Ndiyakucaphukela oko kuthethwa ngam, nangona kuyeyona nto icacileyo emhlabeni. Akukho monsters apha. Ngabantu kuphela, abalandela imigaqo.
Unyana wam wasweleka, nenkosikazi yam, kunye nabanye abantu basekhaya. Ndiphelelwe ngumsebenzi ngenxa yoko. Abemi bamele ukwakha iintsapho ezomeleleyo. Uzuko kuArstotzka.
Ndadlala ngokwahlukileyo kwixesha elizayo. Ndaya ndikhuthalela ngakumbi, ndicinga ngemithetho ngocoselelo - kodwa hayi ngenxa yokuthobela. Yabona, umvuzo wam ongaphakathi kumdlalo usekwe ekubeni bangaphi abantu endibaqhubayo. Ukuba ndisebenzisa abantu abaninzi, kwaye ndenza iimpazamo zero, ndiye ndibhatalwe ngaphezulu. Ukuba ndihlawulwe ngaphezulu, ndinako ukuhlangabezana nezohlwayo zokwenza ngabom iimpazamo. Njengokungenisa umfazi weembacu bendisandula ukuqhubekeka, nangona ebengenayo imvume yokungena. Njengokujika indoda ebandakanyeka kurhwebo ngabantu, nangona onke amaphepha ayo ebefanelekile. Njengokuvuma umfazi lowo isini sakhe singahambelani nesiprintwe kwipaspoti yakhe. Ukuthula okuncinanana, konke kubaliwe, konke kuyingozi. Besendinexhala lonyana wam. Kodwa bendinexhala ngekamva endiliphethe ezandleni zam. Iindlela azifundiswanga, iidomino zilungelelaniswe.
Njengoko ndandigxininisa ndize ndihlole kwaye ndishiya izinto zityibilika, ndiye ndayiqonda into endiyenzayo. Bendi sebenza ngeedrama zolawulo ezenze ubomi bam. Ndazibuza ukuba inoba lomntu uncede umakhulu ungene engxakini. Ndazibuza ukuba ingaba indoda ephika izicelo zeqabane lam inaye na unyana.
U-Becky Chambers ubhala iincoko, isayensi, kunye nezinto ezimalunga nemidlalo yevidiyo. Njengabantu abaninzi be-intanethi, unayo iwebhusayithi . Unokufunyanwa kwi Twitter .
